remember 2015…. you could post what you wanted on social media, everything was pure, nothing was over saturated, the algorithm was normal, followers came and left organically, and not everything was sponsored… mwah
“Years ago a friend of mine had a dream about a strange invention; a staircase you could descend deep underground, in which you heard recordings of all the things anyone had ever said about you, both good and bad. The catch was, you had to pass through all the worst things people had said before you could get to the highest compliments at the very bottom. There is no way I would ever make it more than two and a half steps down such a staircase, but I understand its terrible logic: if we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known.”
me: amy dunne is a sympathetic character to most women not because she is a a good person, but because she shows us one of the most haunting characteristics of our society that we can all relate to, which is that having to grow up and exist as a woman in this world can be enough to turn anyone into a monster. i would even go so far as to argue that the villain in the novel gone girl by gillian flynn is not amy dunne or even nick dunne, but that it is the societal pressures placed on women that so often drive them to insanity, which they are then blamed for as if they are at fault for the ruin placed upon them by others. so i guess that’s why it’s my favorite movie and why i believe the current movement in the genre of psychological thriller revolving around the trials and tribulations of womanhood is better than anything created by male authors who have attempted “social commentary” through novels in the past.
straight guy who im talking to: haha damn that’s crazy… so you a virgin?
as a vegetarian for the past 4 years and having been vegan and once frustrated about others diets: Nobody is going to listen to you through condescension or shaming. if anything this will turn people off and do the opposite of what you intended. not everyone is willing to go all or nothing, and that’s okay. Be encouraging, even having a meatless Monday or cutting out red meats is doing something. don’t shame people for what they eat, inform when asked and lead by example. I know in regards to climate change it can be very pressing to adopt habits, but scare tactics can make people feel useless to do any lifestyle change because of a perceived irreversible impending doom. This literally applies to any lifestyle choice, be respectful and mindful of others
I had this girl in my class and she was considered to be like really dumb. She’d ask a ton of doubts and questions in class, which everybody would consider to be “stupid"and “silly” and even the teachers would often taunt her but she’d never stop asking. But the thing was that she’d almost always top the class examinations and everyone was like???? They all thought she was cheating and stuff and obviously even the teachers were very biased because she wasn’t so ‘smart’ in class, and she was regularly accused of cheating. But nobody could prove that she was actually cheating but the whole class and teachers totally believed that she did. I’m pretty socially awkward so I never really talked to her, but she was leaving school this year and I was genuinely curious about how she was so good during exams and how she didn’t let everyone’s remarks affect her. She always used to sit and hang out with only one girl, and she told me that that friend of hers was severely socially anxious and she’d lag in studies because she couldn’t bring herself to ask doubts in class or ask for help from others. So they had this system where during lectures her friend would write down any question she had, and she would ask them for her. And I was just so touched??? Idk but it really changed the way I looked at people?? This girl endured taunts and jeers and borderline bullying for being “stupid” when she was actually really smart and could easily have refused to ask such doubts for her friend but she did?? And brushed off everything others would throw at her for her friend?? I was just, idk it just really changed me in some way.
This is also a commentary on ableism and how hurtful it is. One girl was so afraid of being seen as “stupid” that it stopped her from learning. And, judging by how her friend was treated for asking those questions, she was right to be afraid.
Ya know, teachers always said “don’t be afraid to ask questions.”
But do you know what happened when you asked questions, at least at my school(s)? They would say “I just taught this, weren’t you paying attention?” So of course that made many of the students feel like idiots because they asked for help, like they should have understood right away.
This girl did something so many of us were afraid to do, and it wasn’t even for herself.
If a teacher responds with “I just taught this, weren’t you paying attention” then they are not a good teacher
Good teachers will explain it and will in fact try an alternative or reformulate what they just taught. also some concepts are hard to grasp the first time so re-explaining the concept is something teachers should expect especially if the topic is dense and each step is crucial. this is my experience with good teachers who ask if there are any quesions
but yes, negative responses like what was mentioned is what discourages people from asking questions in class. if you’re ever anxious though of these scenarios, a good tip is to see what your teacher is like. if they are the type to welcome questions, dont be shy to ask it because chances are someone in the room might have the same question and they would be pleased to explain it
and if you are really anxious then go to office hours and ask your prof privately. in fact, profs love that because you are willing to learn which they appreciate. and they also get to know you! and yeah because if you dont get a concept now, chances are you won’t get what will come next since mastering an early concept is essential to understanding later concepts
also if you feel like you are severely socially anxious and cant ask help, then you have to try and talk to the counsellor in your school and they might be able to assign a scribe for you. in colleges and universities, there are access aides for such students. so if you have a question, you can ask the scribe and they can explain it to you or write the notes in a clearer format.
i must say though that i find it unbelivable that many of the teachers in that school OP is going to/went to assumed this student was cheating. instead of talking to the student and they might have been able to properly investigate as educators the cause and if they find out it’s for another student, they could have provided special help for this student.
at school I never dared to ask questions exactly due to these reasons, that people could think I’m stupid or that the teacher would reply in a dumb way…
well, after leaving school, fast-forward a few years until I had to do an internship during my undergrad studies (at uni I also never asked any stuff til then) and there at work I was given stuff to do that I had never done before but my colleagues all were very nice and helpful and sonfor the first time in my life I dared to actually admit when I needed help, because first of all, my colleagues were really really nice and helpful and second of all, I was WAY more scared of fucking up the job than of asking and then being able to do it properly…so I started asking…and on the last day of my internship my colleagues there told me that one of the things they liked most about me and the way I was working was that I never was afraid to ask anything because they already had interns who didn’t ask and then some things went wrong…so yeah, that’s how I learned that asking for help when in doubt is always better than doing things wrong because only by asking questions you can actually learn new things properly